Expectations of Perfection

Some times being a human is the hardest thing. 
We all have expectations in our brains of how things should go.
How our day should go.
How our week should go.
Even how our life should go.

If you know me at all, you know that I am a planner.
In my mind I like to have everything perfectly laid out. 
I want to know whats going to happen, when it will happen, and what the result will be.
If you are coming to my home for an occasion, I want to have to perfect menu planned. 
If we are planning a vacation, I will spend literally months researching. 
I want to make sure that that vacation is the best it can be.
I aim for perfection.
And in my mind all things go perfectly. 
All the time. 
But then real life happens, and my expectations are always shot down. 
Its not that the actual vacation is bad, in fact it is always almost amazing.  
Its just that it never lives up to what I had planned in my head.  
Now that I have come to recognize this about myself I have learned that I need to back off a little. 
But when you aim for perfection at all times, that really is hard. 

Always aiming and seeing perfection is one of the hardest things in life.  
I can't ever remember an occasion where anything went as perfect in real life as it did in my head. 
This brings with it a sense of utter failure.
All the time.
From the smallest thing of a meal not going as planned, to much larger things in life, like relationships.

"Perfection is annihilation.  It paralyzes us from working from the heart.  Humans by nature are not perfect and imperfections are what make the world beautiful."

This constant need for perfection is tiring. 
It makes me question every small detail of life. 
But at the same time, a lot of times it makes me just give up. 
I tell myself it will never be perfect anyway, so what is the point of trying.  
This has proved to ruin a lot of things in my life. 

Learning to live an imperfect life is hard, and it is something I am working at every day. 
But people, the struggle is real.
There is not a day that goes by that I try to perfect some area of my life. 
Expectations of perfection.  
That is what runs and ruins my life.
They say, "Practice makes perfect", but what they don't tell you is, perfection can never be achieved, no matter how hard you work. 

I found this quote by Mandy Hale that sums this up so perfectly - 

"When you release expectations, you are free to enjoy things for what they are instead of what you think they should be."

More than anything, that is what I want.  
I want to be able to drop my expectations at the door, and live a life enjoying things as they are supposed to be.
I want to be o.k. with something when it doesn't go perfectly. 
And I want to be able to look back on my life and smile, not because life turned out perfectly, but because I learned to accept an imperfect life. 

#12

#12 Describe a typical day in your current life
-------------------------------
I am going to use one day last week as an example, since my current schedule is way off from where it was....

5:43 - alarm goes off, i moan and hit snooze.  Tater come flying up the steps and tavie throws a fit.
5:50 - alarm goes off again, i finally get up
        - take dogs outside and feed them
6:00 - shower
6:15 - get dressed
6:15-6:30 sit and watch the news
6:30 - eat breakfast
6:35 - get self ready for day
6:50 -  head to work
7-12 - working
12-1 - lunch break
1-4 - "working"
4- arrive home.  bre comes over.
we watch olympics until bed time
-------------------------

Before i was infected with what ever it is on my head (stay tuned for update later this week)
I would go to the gym every day after work.
I have since stopped that in an effort to heal.
NOT WORKING
o well
there is my day

dueces

peeves

#11 - Describe pet peeves you have

--------------------------------------

1) When people never follow through with what they said they would do. 

(aka-plans) People lets be honest, alot of people i know are ho-horendous at following through with things.  I have learned to never get my hopes up when they say something will happen.  It drives me crazy that people cant be true to their word!!!!

2) When people chomp their gum.  

Or really chew gum at all.  I just cant stand that stuff!

3) The noise it makes when people scratch their let through jeans.

for real. makes me gag.

4) Being late/people who are late.

just plain rude. 

5) When people come into MY house and are rude to my animals! 

listen up - they live here! YOU DONT 

6) Spoilers. 

For reals stop ruining the olympics for me!

7) People who ruin awesome moments with stupid words. 

8) People who downgrade people with mental handicaps!

NOT ok!!

9) Curse words. 

10) People who can't control their children/ don't even try. 

That is just not ok in my opinion.  You made the child now take some responsibility. 

---------------------


dueces

not #9! #10

I vote to skip #9. y'all ok with that?  awesome.
moving on to #10!

Describe your most embarrassing moment -
-------------------------------
i honestly don't get that embarrassed really,  so this one is tough to answer.
the only thing that really stands out to me is when i was showing my steer at the county fair.
it was 102* out.
he decided to lay down in the middle of the show ring
true story
everyone just laughed and things moved on.
--------------------------------

SO whats happening in my life since last time, nearly a month ago.
a lot actually.


i will update with some pictures :)

celebrated the 4th of july. in kansas

got to see this pretty girl!

had some mishaps

watched this kid pitch his last game of the season

picked up the kiddos. this one had a rough couple days

dropped off my car to get a new transmission

watched this guy plank

baby sat this gem. who screamed for 3 hours straight

won these beuts

walked these babies at the lake

geo met a friend

had a co pilot

watched this guy get some much needed rest

loved my shoes

loved my zombie pups

watched a bone chewing session

chatted with this girl

had a busy thursday!

received this from my hubs

loved on them

cuddled with this girl

dried my hair in front of the fan

went to the beach

watched them nap

jealous they were napping

had a smoothie while watching the olympics!

that was a lot of catch up.  and if you follow me on instagram you have seen all those :)

come by later for a surprise!

dueces

#8 and some catch up

#8 What are 5 passions that you have?
-----------

I like to think of myself as a passionate person!
You may see where my head is at right now by this post!

1 - Adoption and helping any children in need!  I believe whole heartily in adoption.  It breaks my heart to see orphans, or hear about all the children across the world who do not have what it takes just to survive day to day.  There is nothing in the entire world more heartbreaking for me then the thought of a child not knowing a parents love.
And I just read a statement that i think more people need to hear - "Most adoptions from U.S. foster care are free and any minimal costs 
associated with them are often reimbursable."


"the world sees an orphan, but the Lord sees a disciple"
It is hard for me to accept that fact that some people really don't have a heart for adoption.




2- Being a stay at home mother.  I know I am not a mother yet, but I believe 100% in the idea of a stay at home mom.  I do not want any one raising my children.  That is what a mother is for.  Now don't say "o her children are going to be sheltered and non social"  Not true.  I also belief in getting out of the house, play groups, play school, and of course pre school!  But a child needs a stay at home mom. (in my opinion)




3 - Being a good friend.  I know what a bad friend is.  I have had bad friends. And I have been a bad friend!  So I strive to be the best friend I can be.  
To be honest, helpful, there in a time of need, there through the good and bad, trustworthy, and loyal.  


4 - Being the absolute best wife I can be to Mr D.  He is the best husband ever, and I know sometimes i fall short of the "best wife" title.  (at least in my own opinion)  I hold pretty high standards for my self as a wife and always try to uphold those standards.  I am grateful for the man that God placed in my life, and I want to respect and honor him the best I can.




5 - Being involved. Planning. Being busy.  Does these count as a passion?  I think so. 


------------------


There ya have it ladies and gents.  My passions.  
Now some catch up on pictures.  

Mr D and baby Tate share a birthday! And they celebrated yesterday (july 1)
Mr D turned 23, and tate turned 3!
Happy birthday to 2 of my favs!

I went on a little shopping spree.  Liquids only.
75 bottles of powerade.
36 bottles of gatorade.
24 cans of peace tea. 

got new post its at work.  I was excited.  any one guess what color I am using first?

body pump!

NO better way to spend a saturday.
this is a close 6th for a passion!!

thanks for reading
dueces!

dream job

#7 - what is your dream and why??
-----------

I would say my ultimate dream job is to be a stay at home mom.
I know that isn't a paying job.  but i think the rewards are more than any job i could ever have!!!
I believe being a staying at home is the best job any woman can have and I am so excited for the day that dream becomes a reality!



dueces

hard

#6 - what is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?
------------
I have absolutely no clue.  there have been a lot of not so easy things i have experienced.  but the absolute hardest?? That is up for some debate.
Here are some of the hard things
deaths -
- death of my grandma when i was 10
- death of my grandpa when i was 15
- sudden death of my aunt
physical pain-
- mystery growth on my back
-kidney stones
- constant head aches

--------------

There ya have it.
Sorry i have slacked on keeping up
been busy yo!!

dueces